Slashing social circles.

I have been wanting to write this blog post for a while, but I didn't really know *how.* The right words, the right sentiment, just were not coming to mind. I didn't want to narrate myself as some type of victim or beg for pity. I didn't want to put down anyone else in my life who I don't feel as connected to as I do these beautiful, successful, magnificent women.

I spent so many weekends in a row mentally begging someone (anyone) to text me and ask if I wanted to hang out. And it ... just so rarely happened. I would go Friday afternoon to Monday morning and realize, "I haven't even spoken a word out loud. I literally have talked to no one but my dog."

Then I had an "ah-ha" moment. Nobody was contacting me. But who was I contacting? No one. Relationships are a two-way street. Despite not ever wanting to leave the house, I made a deliberate effort to make plans every. single. month (if not more) with a small group of women who I knew I trusted and loved and felt comfortable around. Our last get-together, I actually APOLOGIZED for being the "chatty one" because I normally internalize every thought and feeling.

We *MAKE TIME* to have dinners together. To get mani/pedis. To just *be* with one another and vent and cry and laugh. I NEVER have to worry about them cancelling plans on me. And if they ever did, I would know it's for a valid reason. I don't feel like a "burden" when with them. They don't spend time with me out of "obligation."

Justine - You queen, you warrior. You have something so uniquely special and rare. Just "that something." You make EVERYONE around you feel good and warm and welcome. #moneyhungrybitch

Allison - You are so pure and genuine and wholesome and all things good. Your authenticity bleeds through you. #teamtears #allisonforpresident

Brooke - God. *Let me go write a novel.* As we have talked about time and time and time again, neither of us give off the "warm" energy like Justine and Allison do, but you are my platonic soulmate. We have the rarest friendship, quite possibly, to ever exist, and I just can't imagine not texting you 24/7 about EVERY detail of my life. You may not be "warm" or outwardly sensitive, but you are the best friend I have ever had, and the world doesn't know you like I do. I feel so deeply honored to know and understand and appreciate all of your nuanced "soft spots" and to hear you cry over voice messages, oftentimes while you are walking on a treadmill. #okayyouconvincedme #purefriendship