Brad and I are both survey people, because "feedback is a gift."

I have shared this anecdote multiple times, because really, it’s too funny just to tell once, but this time, it’s relevant. After my and Brad’s first date, I texted HIM instead of my best friend, Brooke.

The next day, this conversation occurred:

“If we do continue to date in any capacity, I am going to need you to change your name, so it’s less similar to ‘Brooke.’”

“Sorry gorgeous, I am Brad Ling. Once you meet my family and friends, you’ll get it. The name is bigger than me, there is nothing I can do about it.” [Editor’s note: I realized just in this moment, he already is SURE I am going to meet his family, while I am using “if” language in the proceeding text].

“Fine, just emotionally prepare yourself to receive texts ABOUT YOURSELF that were intended for Brooke.”

“That’s fine, I’d prefer you talk shit about me to me. Feedback is a gift.”

Feedback is a gift.

That is a sentence we have said to each other dozens of times over the course of a year.

Yesterday, I got home from work, and surprisingly, Brad was at the dining room table instead of in his office. Chipper as a bird, he said, “Hey, babe! I just filled out my 2023 Indiana Tree Survey.”

He had a pile of paperwork from the Arbor Day Foundation, including the 2023 Official Questionnaire for Indiana Trees. He exclaimed, “I feel like this survey was written specifically FOR me.” He read some of the questions.

“Did you ever collect leaves, acorns or pinecones for a school project or just for fun?” “Do you think the Tuliptree is an appropriate choice as the state tree for Indiana?” “Which one of the following would you say is the single most important function of trees?”

He read the questions with so much enthusiasm AND knowledge, I melted. Who knew someone could be THIS passionate about a tree survey? He continued, “They sent us two bookmarks. You can have one! Do you want the Maple or the Oak?”

I chose maple; he made a $50 donation to the Arbor Day Foundation and rambled on about how he needs to learn more about Indiana’s conservation efforts. I melted some more, as I thought that Brad was likely the only person in the entire state filling out this questionnaire and mailing it back.

He broke my train of thought by saying, “Oh, that pile of mail is yours.”

“I HAVE MAIL? HERE? A WHOLE PILE?"

I had a box from Sugarwish; it came with peanut M&Ms and some gummies. Brad was a bit confused, as neither of us really like sweets. I said, “I didn’t order this. It’s a gift from NOW Marketing Group for completing a survey about the social media conference I attended.”

That was an “ah-ha” moment for me. My last blog was titled, “My boyfriend and I have nothing in common.”

But we do. We are both survey people. We both want to politely inform people who plan conferences that strobe lights negatively affect those who are visually impaired. We both save our Taco Bell receipts, not because we think we have a shot at winning the $500, but because we want to tell Taco Bell how freaking awesome Eric is. Brad, specifically, wants the Arbor Foundation to know that he, indeed, does think the Tuliptree is appropriate for the Indiana State Tree.

Feedback is a gift.