What do you do when a condom falls out of your date's pocket?

This is a story from months and months ago; I finally feel ready to share some of the stories I have collected over the last year. This is just a funny one :)

When I first began online dating, I did a lot of private writing/journaling as a therapeutic tool, but now I am ready to share some of those stories publicly.

My track record – two normal, wonderful, respectful, communicative men [one of whom I ended things with civilly after a couple months; the chemistry just wasn’t there] and then Brad [who I am currently dating]. Like, I know "normal" should not be the standard, but if you know, you know.

Outside of those two … I met three others who simply ghosted me and one other who I am 90% sure ended things because I wasn’t putting out after two weeks. Over night, the dude went from "We have a once in the lifetime connection; I have never felt like this before," to "I think I am just a loner."

For the life of me, I will never, ever understand ghosting. We are all adults. How hard is it to shoot a text and say, ‘Hey! It was great meeting you, but I am not interested in pursuing things further.”

I thank GOD the normal, nice guy came first. He really set the table for how dating in your 30s should be. If the other four had occurred first, I would have been a deflated, discouraged mess. So. Many. Mind. Games. Also, I will be honest; I was ignoring red flag after red flag after red flag.

Okay, that was just me setting the table for this blog post: What do you do when a condom falls out of your date’s pocket?

We will call him H. We had a nice enough first date, though I wasn’t over-the-moon giddy about it as we called it a night. He seemed super shy and reserved [which is fine, but as an extreme introvert myself, it’s sometimes easier to open up when dates are outgoing]. We ended the date with a hug (initiated by me). We texted for about a week, and then he asked me on a second date.

For our second date, we went to “Tipsy Bingo.” We both had two drinks; I felt like the date was going much more successfully than our first one; we seemed to be opening up with one another better and spent all night laughing. The thing is … I felt like I was sending flirty signals left and right. Like, “Hey, put your hand on my knee!” He would not take the bait. It was like he was purposely avoiding physical touch.

Which is one reason WHY I was a bit shocked when a condom fell out of his pocket. Right in between us. He did not notice. A million thoughts ran through my head. “Should I pick it up and give it back to him?”

I just let it go. We actually left the bar with the condom still on the ground. I am usually a good read of character, and I did NOT get “I am looking for a hook up” vibes from him whatsoever.

As we were leaving, he asked me if I wanted to grab ice cream … i.e., extending the date, which seems like a good sign, right? The ice cream shop was closed, so he walked me to my car, and we called it a night. I gave him a quick peck on the lips and expected to receive a text later that night.

I would never hear from H again. NOT ONLY did he ghost me, but he UNMATCHED me on the app THAT NIGHT. For those not familiar with Bumble, unmatching is like blocking. It was basically his way of saying, “Not only do I not want to see you again and am too immature to tell you that, but I am ensuring that you have no method to ever reach me again.” I have only gone out of my way to unmatch one person, because seeing him in my feed was emotionally damaging, and I was turning into a crazy person.

Okay, so what do we think, people? Did he mean to drop the condom? Was it some type of test I failed? Why ask to extend the date only to block the person an hour later? This is all water under the bridge, because I simply do not care … other than SHEER CURIOSITY. I need answers!

In hindsight, I should have picked it up and said, "You dropped this."

At least the drinks were super cute!

#onlinedating #datinginyour30s #condomchronicles